Friday, January 16, 2009

Hello Goodbye!

So I am getting a divorce. Had a big fight yesterday over lost socks and me not pressing his shirts lol. Whatever he said then I was right it wasn’t going to work and said he was moving. Well then last night he came home and everything was fine, even though I was still pissed off. So this morning it was fine I was helping him get stuff together and go to the gym. Well I asked for money for laundry detergent, dishwashing tablets and toilet paper. Well he said that I could wash dishes by hand and that he had given me over 400 in the last 2 weeks so I should have money. Well its not true, Ive had like 200, not 400. Anyway I said thats fine don’t give me money but don’t bitch when you have nothing to wipe your ass with lol. So then he started bitching about how dirty our house is which it isn’t. The only thing not clean in our house is the garage. I was like well if it isn’t clean enough now it never will be so I will move. Anyway a lot of back and forth garbage and basically I said I’m done. I can’t take it anymore. I can’t go through this emotional roller coaster every day. He said the only problem in our marriage is that the house isn’t spotless. I do mean spotless too, not just clean. He wants every inch dusted everyday. A full shower, toilet, floor scrub of the bathroom. Its my job you see because I don’t work I should spend 8 hours a day scrubbing and making everything perfect for him. Well Im not going to do it, I don’t want to. That might end his problem with me but its not going to end my problems with him. I checked him email and found him writing to a girl of craigslist. The add he answered was a lady looking for friends only but I don’t care, I didn’t say anything about it but I know that he isn’t going to be happy even witha spotless house. I don’t have what he wants. I’m ok with that I don’t feel that its my fault or something that is wrong with me. Seriously I don’t think he is capable of beinghappy or I wouldn’t be his 4th wife and the man is only 40 years old ya know. Of course he doesn’t want to give me any money. He said he would pay for me to live in this house until our lease is up in May. I’m not staying her though, all it would take for him to change his mind and I would be screwed. I want to move back to Modesto, he says I am being childish because I want to be near my friends. I just dont want him to be in control of my life anymore. I talked to my aunt she has a 1 bedroom house I can rent for 400 a month. That’s what I am going to do weither he gives me money or not. He says we need to have a forensic accountant go over our assets and make me a list of my debts lol. Whatever I don’t care I will just declare bankruptsy. Of course he doesn’t want this to be ugly and complicated right. I don’t know what is going to happen and how but I know I am going. I need to be my own person and not controlled by someone else. It’s not going to be easy unfortunately I love the stupid bastard but were never going to work and I need to get out while I still have some of me left.

Oh yeah and my sister is on her own I already told her. I can't support and take care of all of us. I need to worry about my daughter and I surviving. She is going back to kingman. I just can't take her anymore. My divorce isn't her fault but she hasn't helped any I can tell you that. She knows how he is about the house and almost immediately after I clean something she will come and mess it up. Like in the kitchen she will come cook right after I clean it. She cleans up the big mess but can never seem to wipe up the crumbs or load her dishes into the dishwasher or wipe down the stove. everytime after she feeds her kid she leaves the tray dirty and sets in on my table or countertop. No way I am takinger her with me. I told her I would take her baby but she is on her own. My aunt said I could have the house but no Terri, no problemo she wasn't coming anyway.


  1. Oh, Honey, I'm sorry you're going through this! Thankfully, you seem to have your hair solidly on your shoulders and are able to think clearly. You need to do what is right for you and your daughter, and you seem to be on the right track. As for your sister, sheesh! I feel that her baby would be better off with you, than he would be with her, but in the end that's her decision to make.

  2. Keep your head up sweetie and stay strong. You deserve someone so much better than that!!! Good luck with everything. There are just some people who are never happy with others because deep down they are not happy with themselves.

    Big huge hugs!!

  3. I hope things work out for the best for you~

  4. It would be hard to live like that and I wouldn't blame you at all if you divorced him. Good luck! *hugs*